Meet the committee...
Freddy Barratt - Chairman / manager
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Position: Centre Back
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Preferred foot: Unknown
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Apps (goals): 0 (0)
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Bio: Off the pitch, Fred is a passionate, demanding manager. An aspiring tactician, he seeks to make the most of an opposition’s weaknesses. On the sideline his vocabulary is limited to three expressions: “good areas”, “hunt in pairs” and “where’s my bounce”. Yet to make his debut for Yorxeter due to a long term knee injury, his assets include leadership, great positional awareness and an above average ping. His turning abilities are somewhat questionable...
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Models his game on: Eric Dier
Garo Heath - Club secretary / assistant manager
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Position: Left Wing
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Preferred foot: Right
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Apps (goals): 21 (26)
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Bio: The engine of the club - he keeps things running off the field which allows us to do the business on it. Armed with only a scoop turn and a left foot used solely for balance, this marksman will still finish top of our goalscorer chart year in, year out. Despite being over 6 ft, don't expect to see him getting any with his head though.
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Models his game on: Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang
Joe Watkins - Club treasurer
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Position: Centre-midfield / CDM
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Preferred foot: Right
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Apps (second assists): 17 (129 apparently)
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Bio: Our man in charge of the money, usually found spending his own in Zara on turtlenecks and overpriced beard moisturiser. On the pitch he's the general of the centre circle and master of the sideways pass. You won't catch him doing much running though in case it ruins his latest trim.
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Models his game on: Harry Winks
Elliot Tester - Committee member number 4
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Position: CAM
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Preferred foot: Right
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Apps (goals): 4 (1)
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Bio: A creative and direct playmaker. Likely to be injured for the season (every season). After a failed stint as club social media secretary, nobody really knows what he does around here anymore. Still, claims he's important and could have played for England if it wasn't for this knee injury.
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Models his game on: Wes Hoolahan
Hugo Henderson - Player liaison officer / social lead
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Position: CM (or wherever there is a gap)
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Preferred foot: Right only
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Apps (goals): 19 (3)
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Bio: The tireless midfielder with one leg for magic and one leg for standing can be regularly found outrunning most over of the course of 90 minutes. Uses any excuse to get his rig out that developed after regularly getting kicked into orbit in his first year of men's football in England. Rumours continue to fly that he once won a header but no-one is holding their breath on a second.
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Models his game on: Federico Valverde
